God spiel.

One of the many benefits of living in the bible belt is that you don't have to go very far if you want someone to tell you about Jesus.

Spend a little time in this part of the world, and you'll see scripture posted behind the cash register, and Psalms printed on the to-go napkins. My friend Tawana has observed that your brand-new neighbor might say "Nice to meet you," but is much more liable to make your acquaintance with, "Hey, what church do y'all go to?"

If--like me--you've lived your life on the outside edge of the straight and narrow, it might even do you some good to spend a little time with people whose last act every day is to run back through their memory in search of people who need praying for. And really, I don't mind a little proselytizing every now and then--just as long as I know it's coming, and can already have my story straight.

But sometimes, these people come up with a combination of Christianity and commercialism that makes me just the teeniest bit uncomfortable.

As I was driving to work yesterday, heading for the on-ramp and trying to build up enough speed to convince the cars I was supposed to yield to that "No, I will not be able to stop," I noticed that the oil and lube joint on my right was running an oil change special. I just happen to be in the market for an oil change right now, so I allowed my eyes to drift from the road only as long as it took for me to read the scrolling LED marquee out in front:

Convenient Oil Change--Quick--God has a purpose for YOU!

Because I was not watching the road as I would have been had I not had such an interesting sign to read, my car drifted to the right and the front tire jumped the curb--very nearly taking out the subject sign and almost certainly necessitating a tire alignment in addition to the oil change that I will be purchasing someplace else.

Just in case they got the license number, or something.

Image, Elkridge Geneology Site.